CURIOSITY

Recently, someone said, “I don’t understand banks. Why do they attach chains to their pens? If I trust them with my money, why don’t they trust me with their pens?” I had no answer for his question, but I did immediately recognize the evidence of an inquisitive mind, since I have one myself.

Years ago, I was curious about how I could defend myself in a sticky situation, so I signed up for a self-defense class. The teacher was a burly, retired police officer. He wore protective gear while demonstrating how to raise a knee, break a nose and gouge an eye.  After I asked a few questions such as, “Wouldn’t it be easier just to give him my wallet?” and “Could I get sued if I hurt him?” the officer finally said, “Don’t ask. Just do it!”

After a few lessons, it was time for the final exam that involved throwing the policeman to the floor when he attacked me.  I took one look at the masked attacker, grabbed my purse and ran out of the building.  Yes, I flunked the course, but I did learn to always look behind me when someone is following me.  I have met the nicest people that way.

My son, Josh, is always dismayed when I talk to strangers, but I am just not good at building walls. The thing about walls is that I always want to know what’s behind them.  Every person is unique and has his, or her, own story, which---if you are a good listener--- they are usually willing to share. And, often, I can learn something of value. My goal is to learn one new thing a day, and, if I have done that, it’s an accomplishment.

For instance, when I see people looking at something on the hiking trail, I always ask, “What do you see?” They are happy to share the spotting of a deer hidden in the foliage, or a rare bird on a branch, or a snake sitting on top of a cactus. “How can a snake climb up there without getting impaled on those prickly spines?” Good question! Thick skin.

In my adventures, I have run into a variety of people. One day, I endeared myself to a scantily clothed, young woman, posing for a magazine photo, when I gave her a spritz of bug spray. I have bandaged a bleeding knee on a kid from Alaska, and I said “Hello” in Chinese (the only Chinese word I know that sounds like Knee How) to a woman doing Tai Chi. She followed me all the way back to my car chattering in Chinese. Needless to say, I didn’t learn much from that exchange, except that nodding sagely seems to work.

I usually ask camera-toting visitors if they’d like a group photo. The photo taker is always so pleased to be included in the picture. One day, I told a man to join the group. He said, “I don’t know those people.” So I said, “Well, get in the picture anyway,” and he did. Years from now, no matter how inquisitive they are, those people still won’t recognize him.

Children have an annoying habit of asking, “Why? Why? Why?” and adults have an annoying habit of replying, “Because. Because. Because” The children are curious, but eventually find out that parents don’t have all the answers.

As I get older, life gets, as Lewis Carroll said, “Curiouser and curiouser.” With modern technology information is instantaneous. Unfortunately, too often, as Oscar Wilde observed, “The public have an insatiable curiosity to know everything, except what is worth knowing.”

There are so many questions still to be asked, and I’m sure many answers will be found, but sometimes people want to discourage those with inquisitive minds by recounting the proverb, “Curiosity killed the cat.”  However, few people remember that, “satisfaction brought it back.”

Esther Blumenfeld (“Curiosity killed the cat, but for awhile I was a suspect”) Steven Wright.