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    For some reason, that I cannot comprehend, President Trump thinks it’s okay to use his bully pulpit to publicly insult anyone who gets in his way. However, it is well to note that self-deprecating humor is not part of his repertoire.

    So, what’s a sitting duck to do in defense of an all-out verbal or active thumbs Presidential assault? Some of Trump’s minions have chosen to grin and bear it, while he skewers, lambasts and rips them apart. That just isn’t finger licking good!

    However, he and others like him, would be well warned to avoid professional comedians whose humorous tactics can sabotage any attacks with their razor sharp wit and bevel-edged jokes, that they can deliver with machine gun precision.

    Humor is the weapon of the underdog, and success depends on striking hostile forces hit-and-run style and getting away with it fast—-no matter with whom you are dealing. Successful comedians have thrown barbs such as:

    “One hundred years ago, Congress gave Presidents more respect.  Of course, look what happened to them. Today, they are all dead.”

    “I know that you reporters are looking forward to hearing the dope from the top. Well, I am proud to introduce——“

    “This person standing next to me has no equals—Superiors, Yes!”

    “For years, this powerful man has rewarded me with money and promotions. And, to think that I owe it all to the morning I saw him coming out of the Pine-tar Motel on Maiden Lane.”

     To defend oneself men and women of irony need quips and chains, cutting remarks and perfect timing with infrared sarcasm sensors.  However, unless you are a professional, it is well advised to use this tactic sparingly. Sad to say, sometimes it is simply necessary unless you are a total wimp. But beware. Because, it’s easy, even for professional comics, to lose their grip after rappelling down the precipice of good taste.

    One time, I was Mistress of Ceremony at a large gathering. I gave the speaker a kind but humorous introduction. He gave his speech and then offered to answer some questions.  One woman decided that it was her turn to give a speech instead.  I interrupted her by saying, “There has to be a question in there somewhere.” It worked.

    So here are some rules for Guerrilla Humor:

    A good offensive joke is the best defense.
    When someone knock-knocks, don’t answer.
    Blast your target at close range with high caliber come-backs.
    Ad-libs are funnier when practiced first.
    Melt down and recycle old, worn-out but well tested jokes.

    And, when the  bully, who can dish it out, but can’t take it, protests, you might want to suggest to him, “Sir, when your IQ reaches 90—-Sell!”
    Remember:  “Shoes pinch, death hurts, humor kills!”

    Esther Blumenfeld (Based on “How to Survive a Roast,” Blumenfeld and Alpern, Coffee Break Column, BUSINESS ATLANTA MAGAZINE, May 9, 1989)

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